love a-fair

It’s that special time of year. The State Fair’s in town.

The picture is not new (I've lost weight since then : )!). It is from the first year the Pastor and I got married and decided to go to the fair as WTC - White Trash Couple. The Pastor didn’t want to be my date this year, so I took my WTK, White Trash Kid. Just kidding. We went as our own socio-economic bracket. He wore shoes and has braces and highlights and Aero jeans, so he is hardly trashy. We went today, on the 2nd day of the Fair, before the Carnies start to stink and the grease gets old.

My earliest memories of going to the State Fair involve kidnapping and bondage.

When I was a young child, two girls got kidnapped from the Fair. They were never seen again. That kind of thing can really freak out a little kid, so whenever I heard the words “State Fair” I would immediately think “Scary place where people disappear. Don’t go!” Well, don’t go because of that and because I’m really not into fried food.

Another thing that gives me anxiety is trying to find my car in a large parking area like the State Fairgrounds. About half the time, I can’t find my car at Target or the mall, and I go to those places frequently and try to park in the same general area each time. I experienced this lost car trauma when Nate and I did “Haunt the Zoo” in 2000. Fortunately, I’d gotten Nate all jacked up on red punch and by the time I finally found the car he’d sugar-crashed and fallen asleep. He has no recall of my meltdown. He’s obviously blocked it from his memory.

OK, back to the Fair.

The year following the kidnapping incident, my mom decided she had to go to the Fair. Never mind the fact she had three small children and my cousin Chutney, she decided we would go (she must not have been concerned about locating her large, yellow station wagon - maybe it was easier to spot). She also decided to tie us together with rope.

Yes, she tied us together with rope. I don’t know if that damaged us in some way. Maybe my brothers/cousin have issues with being tied up now, I can only speak for myself. You’d never get away with something like that now, with DHS and all.

I’m still convinced that someone must have seen us at the Fair like that and went on to invent the kiddie-leash.

Just a few things I “didn’t get” at the Fair this year:

1. People with the following thought process. Yes, we JUST had a baby and have left the hospital. Where should we go with our fresh infant? Should we go home and take care of our newborn? I know! Let’s take it to the Fair! I saw three newborns.
I didn't leave my house for three weeks with a baby, but it was winter and I was crazy. That's a whole other post.

2. Ear of corn on a stick, giant turkey legs. I don’t get these. Fried cheese, fried Snickers, french fries (why would I eat something I can eat anytime and don’t), fried corn dog, and fried MASHED POTATOES. Nasty.

I totally understand:

1. Funnel cake. A funnel cake has 24 Weight Watcher points. I was a good Weight Watcher and decided to split one with Nate. I only ended up eating half of my half, which left room for -

2. Cotton Candy. Nate ate the blue, he said it was better; I had the pink (of course).

3. Busting out of our sheltered bubble. Nate went down the giant slide on some sort of large square of fabric. When he was done, he told me that the State Fair employee had used a curse word when conversing with him. I told Nate, like the funnel cakes, there are some things you only get to experience at the Fair. Enjoy!

And the thing I absolutely did GET at the fair:
Riding the “Tower of Power.” I did it three times.