Rise and Shine

I woke up to an inbox full of e-mails from the Pastor, who wanted to video chat with me first thing this morning.

I called him, only to hear him complain that I was wearing the same thing I was the last time we chatted. Of course I was! He called me last night, we video chatted, I went to bed, I woke up and called him again. There were no wardrobe changes.

In an effort to make him happy, I took my sleep-shirt off. Now he was, oddly, really displeased. He's not that kind of Pastor.

So I ran to the freezer and grabbed the package of steaks I bought for his return home next week, and I covered up with those. Maybe I could entice him with meat.

But this didn't have the desired
effect either. He was laughing too hard to talk about anything.

And I was getting frostbite.


the art of war

The Pastor is still away studying "Peace and Conflict Resolution."

Not to be outdone, I went another direction. I stayed here and have been practicing the art of "War and Conflict Institution" with a specialization in Marital Strife, or "How to get your husband ticked off at you when he is a whole day ahead of you 101."

I was just trying to help the Pastor use some of his newfound skills?

Here's what I've learned in my intensive study plan. Turns out the Pastor's new skills are actually intended to be applied on a more global scale. Turns out the Jetson's lied and the best way to communicate (argue) about anything is not Skype, Skype chat, e-mail, e-mail chat, text messages, e-mails sent as text messages, voice mails transcribed into text messages, Youtube videos, Facebook chat, Facebook or Google Circles (I don't even know what that is). Turns out if you are going to make your husband really, really mad, maybe it is good to do it when he's been hanging around a bunch of Buddhists and some of that deep breathing and meditation has rubbed off.

I think we've kissed and made up, as best as you can from 12 time zones away. I'm not going to let the Pastor know that though. Conflict may have some negatives, but it can be good for the waistline. If I can just keep the argument going for a couple more days, I'll make my goal weight.

And that, my friends, brings true peace.