Ahhhh, what a difference a year makes. Me and the Pastor, last Christmas. Don't worry Mom, my hair is no longer 1. short! and 2. brown!  

Happy New Year, from my blue toes.  

Don't ya wish you were me? Then you would have matchy-matchy Paul Frank shoes & shirt. These pics aren't very good cuz they are from my camera phone.  

the dolls and teddy bears are watching you!

just to bring you up-to-speed -

1. I know, I know. When you saw the headline "Pastor's Wife Removed from Flight", you must've thought oh THAT'S why she hasn't posted to her blog. That was Joel Olsteen's wife. My Pastor doesn't have that much hair. I WAS forcibly removed from a flight, but it wasn't by the flight crew. It was by the Pastor when I realized the plane we were on was continuing to Cancun and I didn't want to get off.

2. I worried about what to pack, wear, how to act, how the kids would act blah blah blah on our trip to see the Pastor's parents. I thought I had thought through every worst-case scenario. But it turns out the only thing I should have been doing to prepare for the trip was building up my immunity. Because the Pastor got sick before we left, then he gave his cooties to me just in time for me to be the one to give it to my in-laws. Me! Every single person in our family, and the Pastor's parents, was sick on our trip. Every. single. person.

3. Younger daughter told the Pastor's parents that she (a.) doesn't like to read the bible and (b.) doesn't like to go to church. Boring!

4. OK, it WAS a really bad idea for me to tell younger daughter, who is afraid of clowns and people wearing animal costumes, that all of Grandma's dolls and teddy bears were watching her. Then I had to go into the bedroom where she was sleeping and remove all the dolls and bears who kept staring at her.

5. It's a good thing there's a lot lot lot of days left before Christmas, because I am definitely on the naughty list already. You think #4 was bad, trust me, I got so much worse than that.

6. My toenail polish is just like me. Blue, with a little sparkle on it. But mainly just blue.

7. Let's look on the bright side. The Pastor was married to someone more evil and less cute than me, and he stayed married to her for a long time. And she didn't have as many pairs of pretty panties, did she?

8. I got to go to a Forever 21 store.

9. I got two Hello Kitty Waffle makers, so I took one back and exchanged it for the Hello Kitty juice maker.

And maybe, just maybe, if I make fresh-squezzed orange juice and kitty-shaped waffles with warm vanilla syrup for breakfast, the Pastor will want to kiss and make up.

pay-at-the-pump

Not a good sign. When your plane has to stop for gas.

I'll Fly Away

On the way to the aeropuerto.

Ever so slight mix up over flight times this morning, therefore we ended up having to leave an hour earlier than we had planned. And I really needed that hour. Older daughter coughed all night. The Pastor and I both only got a couple of hours of sleep. So Mommy is about to lose it
already.

And and and and!!!! This hacking cough I have has resulted in me losing all control of my bladder. I hope this is not permanent. Do ya think Depends has a thong version???

It's not wrong

to take two pairs of gold shoes on my va-ca is it? I know, I'll only be gone a week, but I really need both pairs.

snowmen toes

Season's greetings from my toes to you.

Nutcracker skirt. 

At the Nutcracker! 

Can you keep a secret???

Shhhhh! Don't tell anyone. I'm definitely supposed to be packing for the trip. I'm definitely NOT supposed to be sitting here, drinking chai and reading the magazine I bought to read on the plane. But I don't feel well, and I canoodled the Pastor into going to get me tortilla soup at On the Border.

perhaps I spoke too soon

Walgreens. Pharmacy. Flu season. Endless waiting, and I really have to pee. I have heard ALL ABOUT the medical condition of one of the other customers waiting for an Rx. THIS might just be the picture of Hell.

Ho Ho No!

Sitting in the car. Waiting. It is snowing here. Big pretty flakes, but they melt as soon as they hit something.

I thought the Nutcracker was good. Just when you thought you had seen it all with the guys in white tights, the guy in flesh-colored tights came out. It was a bit like being at the ballet with Beavis and Butthead though, as you could hear the male snickers every time one of the guy dancers appeared on stage.

Three out of four people presently in our family (Nate is with his dad) are not feeling well. This is not a good thing as we are going to the aeropuerto Monday to fly on a big jet airplane. We are going to see the Pastor's parents for Christmas.

I have a lot of anxiety about traveling with the kids. We went on a big trip last summer. We hadn't been married for too long, no one was really used to each other, so we loaded everyone up in a big church van and drove across the United States. Who thought that was a good idea???

So I am nervous about the family traveling together, and I am nervous about being a good Nazarene wife/daughter-in-law. This will only be the third time I've seen my in-laws. The first time was the wedding, the second time was on our cross-country trek.

Mom is out of town and can't tell me what is proper. Perhaps I need some nice Nancy Nazarene to come over, be my personal Nancy Nazarene stylist, make me sign a "ho no more" pledge, and help me pack some suitable outfits.

I am going to be a good girl

because I fear Hell might just be like a Wal Mart the Saturday before Christmas.

Doing my part though. I went to Wal Mart because I had a return. I didn't buy anything, so I made a negative impact on their bottom-line today! Ha!

sponsored in part by the Nazarene church

The Pastor is taking me to eat Mexican food and see The Nutcracker tonight. I am so excited. I have always wanted to go and have never been. The Nazarenes are paying for the dinner, so it must be o.k.

Nathan's birthday party. I apparently got a present at the party too . . . boobs. 

Sure it was the kid's birthday party, but who says Mom can't have fun too!!!

Natural gas disaster across the street from the Parsonage the night of Nate's party. Not very much fun to come home with fire trucks parked in front of your house. I put a positive spin on it though - told Nathan we had gone to great effort to get firemen and the trucks for his party!  

One of Nathan's b-day presents - Bionicle. The Pastor fancied this toy.  

Nate's b-day cake. Can you believe a pastor's wife would let their kid have a Harry Potter theme cake? Gasp!  

Mmmmmmm! Me at Church's Fried Chicken.  

You would never guess they are not *real* brother and sister, would you? Check out the cake we made out of a Pepperidge Farm Box cake and a box of those Pepperidge Farm cookies. The kids had fun putting it together.  

like hot McDonald's french fries, right out of the bag

Listening to "Like a Virgin" on my iPod. Not just ANY "Like a Virgin", but the extended dance re-mix. My iPod makes me so happy. I'm not even going to tell you how many times I've listened to Captain & Tenille, Tears for Fears, Hall and Oates, oh... and Eminem.

how I knew my son was my son
We celebrated my sons's 10th birthday early. Technically it's not til December 20th. Even though I carried him around in my uterus, Nate really doesn't look like I had anything to do with him, except he did get my blue eyes.

There are very few occasions when I've actually seen myself reflected in my son. There was one time, when I caught him sitting on the kitchen tile eating green olives right out of the jar. I knew on that day he was MY boy. Then this past weekend, when we were getting dressed for his b-day dinner, he put on three shirts before he finally decided on the fourth one. In that moment. I knew he had my style dna in his genetic make-up. Then he did a similar thing with fixing his hair. Now if I could only make this sort of headway with the daughters.

The Pastor and I have been enjoying some kid-free time this week. It's amazing how much better the quality of our relationship is without children. I'm not sure how other married couples, who have their children around all the time, actually have intact marriages.

The Pastor and I enjoyed sleeping in until 10:15 on Saturday morning. Since I married the Pastor, I have become the laziest person ever. Anyway,10:15 a.m. is about four hours later than we get to sleep when younger daughter is around and wakes up early and thinks because she is
awake everyone in the house should be awake too.

Speaking of having an intact marriage, there are just some things you cannot possibly predict will be a problem in your marriage. For instance, I know what I agreed to and vowed and all that jazz, but I had NO IDEA I was marrying someone who would not respect boundaries with my library card.

Before I married the Pastor, I went to the library. I tried to get my son excited about the library and would try to take him to stuff there. I usually had a fine for my tardiness in returning materials. But the Pastor goes to the library EVERY FREAKIN' DAY. If they had some sort of
frequent flyer program at the library, he would have more points than anyone. So the Pastor decided since he pays my bills blah blah blah,he could check out the maximum number of library materials on my card and double his check-out ability. That might have been ok for him to max-out my library card, but the one book I did get, he read before me and told me it wasn't worth reading. I finally had to sit him down and ask him to not use my card or spoil the plot of my book. If that doesn't work, I'll have to change my library card number and not tell him

I think we have a Christmas party every night this week except for Tuesday. You think its tricky trying to figure out dress codes like "business casual" and "holiday casual" and "resort casual" and "semi-formal", just try and figure out "Nazarene party wear" that doesn't involve some ugly Christmas sweater.

When it's a bad idea to go to Church

When you fail to plan . . . .
You end up eating at Church's Fried Chicken.

Milkshake Night. 

Milkshake Night.

Milkshake Night. 

No party is complete without the fabulous party shoes, purchased for $1.50 at Goodwill. And they are Nine West shoes!  

Side view of the hair. Why didn't someone tell me my arms are so fat??? 

The hair, from the back. Hair good, bra strap bad. Not very Nazarene, to show one's bra.  

A view from the top. I fixed my hair! It looked really cute (I thought)! I can't believe some people are actually able to get ready for a party in less than 8 hours.  

Me and the Pastor. Check out my cute party purse! 

I don't know what is more amazing! 1. I appear to have become larger than the tree. 2. I actually look like I have boobs. 3. I fixed my hair.  

Our family at a Christmas party this week. Turned out being a "Medieval Theme". Glad we all got dressed up so we could eat with our hands and not use napkins. You try to work with the kids on manners, and then...

Children of the Corn

Hmmmm... perhaps I should change the name of the blog to thepastorisafreak... he made this labyrinth thing in the field next to the Parsonage, so he could go walk in circles. And go figure, the kids love walking in circles too. Who needs toys?!?

I like Frosty. He's a baldy like the Pastor.

Imagine my surprise. Up close, he LOOKED like Frosty, but now that I'm looking at the picture, I'm thinking it may just have been a man in a costume.