bewitched

I can't imagine that anyone outside my parents has the desire to watch this thing, but here's six minutes of:

1. Me with hat & hat hair. It was so cold, I found out what evil must feel like. Two days in Salem before the Pastor's conference taught me they didn't actually burn witches at the stake, they hung them. But had anyone tried to burn me, I would have said thank you very much for trying to get me warm. I especially love all the pictures where it was more important for me to button my coat however crookedly I could rather than to risk being cold. $438 BCBG coat (ha I didn't pay that much for it on E-Bay!) with three buttons, and I can't get it right.

2. Everything I was able to see with the Pastor before and after his conference with 7,000 Bible geeks, and everything I saw by myself and convinced random strangers on the street to take my picture. Don't worry, I didn't take any candy from anyone.

3. I'm actually standing around some pretty famous stuff - Charles Dickens' mirror, the place where Nathaniel Hawthorne hung out, where President Kennedy proposed to Jackie, blah blah blah.

4. No wonder the Pilgrims settled here. Its a magical land, with a Dunkin' Donuts on every corner. The Pastor said it was the closest I would ever get to to getting my double d's. Not a terribly funny joke, but when you're around this many Bible geeks, it doesn't take much to look like a stand-up comic. On the flip side, what were you Pilgrims thinking? If it were ever up to me to settle a new land, if I got off the boat in December and it felt like 20 below freezing, I'd get back on the boat. Actually it would be more realistic to say that I'd never have gotten on the small, smelly boat to begin with.

5. $31 to ride a train, $20 in cab fair, $6 at Dunkin' Donuts - $57 total for the biggest disappointment ever - Plymouth Rock. A mere pebble which is such a lame rock it even cracked and had to be glued back together and cannot actually be traced back to the Pilgrims. Its a farce! It was actually more exciting (and cheaper) to watch the street fight we saw in front of our hotel.

6. Everything I ate. I had to store some fat for warmth. What else could I do, wandering around Boston by myself without the Pastor to keep me warm while he was listening to the Scholars. Bisque and coffee helped.

If you have the patience to watch through to the end, there's actually a picture of me without my hat, and I almost look pretty.